Natas

Satan, its not that i hate you...
I cant love you ... no one can

but i do feel

for the worn out beats of the heart are the only ones that remain in me pure.

once you were loved

... and then you paid.

a price heavier

... than the value.

you were close

... and thus now are far.

I can't be so brave to let go the person i love and take up hate for him...

I can be alone but not be lonely in spite...

Yet i cannot love you for it is forbidden...

but feelings are not tame...

but pity would put you to shame.

so ....

i just ignore you.

An Epilogue for Myself....

When i die, let it be on the shores of Ganga
When the sun sets and the leaves droop.

The sun sets daily with no wails, no cries
only to rise tomorrow anew.
Let me rise daily not as the record of the past
but of a nostalgia lost somewhere beneath the rubble of the day.

The Ganga flows ...
with no one to mourn it's departure
Let me stay ...
not as a monotonous grief but as a song that refreshes time itself.

Leaves bloom, droop and drop to be the food for the earth.
Let me bloom, droop, then drop to be the fodder of the lame.

a pinch of nothing . . .

He says: I love you
I say : That's what i fear.

He says: I want only you.
I say: That's what i dread.

He says: I'll always be with you.
I say: That's only what i long